Hypothetical situation: you meet a girlfriend of yours for drinks every few months, and lately each time you see her, she seems to have gained a new layer of padding. You truly love your friend, and you are worried she’s headed to frumpsville, a place you are all too familiar with yourself. Fortunately, you think to yourself, I know just want she can do to reverse this trend.
Stop right there.
You are in this predicament because you have just enough information to be dangerous. You dropped the pounds yourself and have set up your own good, stable, healthy routine. And all you want to do is share your secrets with the world. You care about this woman and can see oh so clearly as her car heads towards the cliff.
What I normally do is keep my mouth shut. Believe me, this is HARD. But, you know what? Ever heard of “Not Created Here” Syndrome? Basically, the theory states what we all inherently know – if she doesn’t come up with the idea on her own, your carefully thought out suggestions are going nowhere.
This doesn’t mean that you can’t set up a situation where she “discovers” the idea on her own. Plant the seed. Share your story and what’s worked for you without suggesting she follow suit. When she’s ready, she’ll know to come to you.
I’ve tried to lead by example in my own life. And you know what? People notice. My sister is now vegan as are my husband and mother-in-law. One of my more competitive friends who started out a soda-drinking, meat-eater has followed behind me every step of the way. She’s now vegan and mostly gluten- and sugar-free. I never sat these people down – they just saw me get healthier and healthier. That was advertisement enough.
I’ve answered plenty of questions and made it clear that I’m open to conversation anytime. When interest was expressed, I gave out vegan cookbooks or podcast cds as presents. But never without first receiving that interest.
The trick is not to push and not to over-share.
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